Keir Royale

Some people arrive at work feeling fresh and ready to face their e-mails with humour and enthusiasm, after a restorative evening of relaxation.

I imagine those people are not parents.
Not of my children, anyhow.

I arrive at work feeling I’ve done a day’s hard graft, ready only to sit, numb and glum, in front of a screen - with just enough conscious thought to be glad it doesn’t crowd me with complaints, arguments and unreasonable demands.

This morning, by the time I left the house at 8.15am I had: -

- showered, dressed etc
- made 2 packed lunches
- finished laying breakfast table after half-hearted attempt by Hannah
- practiced 10 spellings each with 2 children
- gone through 8 times table with Hannah
- found out that Ben had not brought his homework home - again
- checked contents of 2 PE kits and 1 football kit
- plaited Hannah’s hair (fruitless nit prevention tactic)
- supervised 5 minutes of violin practice (Hannah)
- supervised 5 minutes of piano practice (Ben)
- searched for lost glove (still lost, probably forever)
- grabbed pile of bills in the hope I would remember to deal with them at work

After that, driving to work on my scooter in drizzle and gale force winds was a welcome 20 minute hiatus.

Just me, a whining 50cc engine and a howling wind.

Bliss.