Bella Dancerella

learning from Bella

Is there any more dispiriting sound than the theme tune to Bella Dancerella?

The nodding numpty with the saccharine smile, whose entreaties to join in with Bella Ballet (with the accent on the final syllable, I ask you) is enough to send me back out into the doghouse.

But doesn’t Hannah love it.

She and a friend spent the entire 30 minutes of pearly-white torture concentrating on Bella’s instructions as if a bucket if Haribo sweets depended on it.

Bella Dancerella we can learn ballet…

practice all the moves and you can be a star, twirl little girl place your hands on the barre…

Bend your knees it’s called plie, up on your toes for a releve…

tummy tucked in and don’t stick it out…

pretty and graceful it’s Bella Ballet

Graceful it wasn’t, but they jumped, twirled, stuck out their tushes and generally giggled their way through it.

And then I noticed the warning on the DVD…

“Not for use without adult supervision”

Eh?

Apparently untrained children could hurt themselves trying to do plies and releves unless a concerned adult is watching nearby, ready to jump in with a warning or two.

“Careful you don’t tear your cruciate ligament with all that jumping and bending, dear.”

“Remember, twirling can be dangerous, keep you heels in contact with the carpet at all times.”

active listening

I mean, does it look dangerous to you?

About Beta Mum

Here you can find the ramblings of a trapeze artist turned journalist who ran away from the circus to join the BBC. Cathy "mine's a Kir Royale" Keir then spent thirteen years working in Jersey, Guernsey and Devon, before downgrading to what you see before you. She has contributed articles to The Guardian, The Stage and Television Today, Junior Magazine and both the BBC and Bad Mothers Club websites. She has two children who think women can’t be prime ministers. She blames herself.
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6 Responses to Bella Dancerella

  1. Mopsa says:

    Perhaps a child might catch their foot in a yard of tulle, or develop a dangerous love for pink, but otherwise, I can think of more dangerous pursuits!

  2. Rilly Super says:

    you may scoff at the H&S advice Cathy but my husband was in bed for a week after he put his back out bending over to do up my daughter’s pointe shoes. an unforgiving mistress, ballet

  3. Iota says:

    I think the danger is one you identified early on – the woeful pronounciation of ballet as b’laaay.

  4. Jen says:

    I think the warning should be for the parents – I can see the whole thing inducing a serious dose of nausea.

    Am rather glad of my muddy, rugby-playing boys. No dangers there at all… eek!

  5. Beta Mum says:

    Mopsa – it’s too late to avoid the love of pink, but I’m told it does pass.

    Rilly – she is indeed. i remember the bleeding toes from pointe work, much more painful than a mere back problem.

    Iota – and the tendency to nod and smile as if you have some kind of palsy

    Jen – Hm, rugby. Haven’t got there yet. Boy not too keen on team sports, prefers climbing. Also free from danger… not!

  6. Linda says:

    My daughter has given up b’laaaay deciding she wants to be on Pop Idol instead. I am beside myself. Oh the stress.

    But more dispiriting I’m sure than this tune, is the sound of your daughter asking AGAIN if we can go and see Bratz the Movie.

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