Nativity no-no

a model street urchin

It’s coming up for that time of year when all slack parents – beta mums, delta dads et al – cut holes in sheets for heads and arms, and stick a bit of tinsel onto a wire coat hanger.

“There you go darling, a real little angel,” we mutter, trying not to laugh.

But at my children’s school, this is not de rigeur.
The Christmas Show (not the Nativity Play, you’ll notice) necessitates a street urchin costume for Ben, so his own clothes will do fine.

The juniors are doing a version of Scrooge, which seems to involve a song about sausages and pizzas – not something I remember featuring in Dickens’ original.

When Ben told me about their show I suggested, helpfully I thought, that I should read the story to him at bedtime.

His response was scathing…

“I don’t need you to read it to me, We watched the DVD at school.”

The infants are going off at quite a tangent. They’re doing something about Dr Who.

I was hoping a dalek suit wouldn’t be called for, as I feel just about up to an alien blob of some kind, or even Sarah Jane at a stretch.

But no. Yesterday Hannah informed me she’d had the choice of being a Cyberman or a Dalek, and she chose to appear as a dalek.


Not something I can run up on my ancient hand-operated sewing machine using an old sheet and a coat hanger.

I’m awaiting construction instructions from her teacher – which I can then pass on to their Dad as I’m working away for a few weeks.

About Beta Mum

Here you can find the ramblings of a trapeze artist turned journalist who ran away from the circus to join the BBC. Cathy "mine's a Kir Royale" Keir then spent thirteen years working in Jersey, Guernsey and Devon, before downgrading to what you see before you. She has contributed articles to The Guardian, The Stage and Television Today, Junior Magazine and both the BBC and Bad Mothers Club websites. She has two children who think women can’t be prime ministers. She blames herself.
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5 Responses to Nativity no-no

  1. Potty Mummy says:

    Could be worse – Boy #1 is a piper, and not only do we need to sort out a kilt, we need to persuade him to wear it. Just blogged about it, actually – it’s clearly the thing to do right now. Good luck with the Dalek suit!

  2. Im ages away from this stage but will we really be expected to make costumes ? I cannot sew a button on

  3. Lucy Diamond says:

    Good luck with the dalek costume – I wouldn’t know where to start!
    My son is a line-dancing cowboy for his Christmas concert which I think is hilarious. Have no idea how this will fit in with the nativity story but there you go… Am intrigued to find out!

  4. mid-lifer says:

    Good grief – how do you do a dalek ..grey clothes and a sink plunger??

    Do these teachers think we are made of time, energy and inspiration?

    The last one my boy was in, he was herod and the school made his clothes so I was laffin

  5. Beta Mum says:

    Potty – a boy in a skirt in front of his mates – that’s a tough one!

    Laura – it’s not usually this hard, but yes, it’s costumes-r-us when you’re a parent. I find gaffer tape works well instead of a needle and thread.

    Lucy – Mike has taken on the dalek costume with vigour. He’s spending today cutting, sticking and shopping. I think he wants his to be the best!

    mid – there’a apparently been rebellion in the playground over this dalek edict. There are even instructions for its construction and a deadline for delivery.

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