an overflowing bath - not mine

School is a wonderful thing.

Not only does it occupy many hours of the children’s time, it also means I can stop worrying so much about swearing in front of them.

They know it all now, and most of it not from me.

In fact – from gazing in open-mouthed horror when our first-born toddler uttered the word –

“Fock-in-hell” in a voice as clear as cut glass (well what would you expect from the spawn of two broadcasters) – we can now sit back and curse, safe in the knowledge that their school friends would laugh out loud if they heard the mild-mannered expletives which occasionally spill from our mouths.

I left the bath running for too long tonight, and when I dashed in to find water dribbling down the overflow, lapping just an inch from the rim, I heard a loud –

“Shit!” spill from my lips before I had time to button it.

“Mummy stop swearing,” rebuked by nearly nine year old son, valiantly trying to get to sleep in his room, inconveniently situated next to the bathroom.

“Sorry, but I nearly flooded the kitchen,” I replied, contrite but also amused.

Give it ten years and I can slowly work back up to my full selection of curses – and maybe nick a few of their up-to-date teenaged ones too.

Perhaps there are some compensations for the increasingly mind-melding and nit-picking arguments we have to suffer as they grow older and more articulate.

About Beta Mum

Here you can find the ramblings of a trapeze artist turned journalist who ran away from the circus to join the BBC. Cathy "mine's a Kir Royale" Keir then spent thirteen years working in Jersey, Guernsey and Devon, before downgrading to what you see before you. She has contributed articles to The Guardian, The Stage and Television Today, Junior Magazine and both the BBC and Bad Mothers Club websites. She has two children who think women can’t be prime ministers. She blames herself.
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3 Responses to Progress

  1. Crikey, Cathy! Oh, sugar and fudge.

    Hope you had a lovely Christmas. All the best for 2008.

  2. SpiralSkies says:

    Christmas Morning. No. 1 Son smirks.

    ‘I liked it when you tried to sneak my stocking in last night. Especially when you dropped it and everything fell out. Whispering ‘bollocks’ really loud really marked the start of Christmas though.’


    Happy New Year X

  3. Beta Mum says:

    MatL – Zounds! Thanks and best wishes to you too.

    SS – I think we may be reaching that period in No 1 son’s life now too. He’s become a confirmed sceptic.

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