“Will you just shut up!”

Ben has become fixated on the possiblity that his father and I may, one day, in the future or perhaps tomorrow, split up.

He cheerfully says things like –

“If you two split up, who would Hannah and I live with? Would I go with Daddy and Hannah go with Mummy?”

I reply, just as happily –

“No, we’d cut you both in half and keep a bit each.”

And he asks –

“Mummy, if I just lived with you, would you have bought me things like pen-knives?”

“No,” I say, smugly, “because I don’t want you to cut all your fingers off, one by one, and end up sitting in a congealed pool of blood soaked demi-digits.”

“Nor does Daddy,” he retorts, in a way that reveals how tiresome he thinks me.

It may be he’s reaching an age where he’s noticing that some of his friends live with one parent rather than two, or it may be that Mike’s looking after them a lot at the moment – which is throwing our divergent parenting styles into relief.

Perhaps he’s thinking,
“If she weren’t around I’d get to stay up later, eat my favourite sausages every night and saw branches off trees with my uber-sharp penknife on a regular basis.”

But when I got home the other night they were both on the doorstep, in their pyjamas, waiting in the rain.
After the excited squeals of “Mummy!” the first thing Ben said was –

“I haven’t been crying in the night Mummy.”

About Beta Mum

Here you can find the ramblings of a trapeze artist turned journalist who ran away from the circus to join the BBC. Cathy "mine's a Kir Royale" Keir then spent thirteen years working in Jersey, Guernsey and Devon, before downgrading to what you see before you. She has contributed articles to The Guardian, The Stage and Television Today, Junior Magazine and both the BBC and Bad Mothers Club websites. She has two children who think women can’t be prime ministers. She blames herself.
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3 Responses to Separation

  1. Mya says:

    Awwww. Poor little chap – it’s tough getting to grips with the world of adults. Not easy for you either.

    Mya x

  2. Potty Mummy says:

    Sweet boy. Nothing more to say than that, is there?

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