Whodunnit?

the murder weapon

What connects the following?
And here’s a clue. They are all monikers…

Dog Catcher
Can’t Remember
Scrotum
Cannonfodder
Ramraider
Pervey

If you are someone who runs merely to get to the pub, you may know the answer.

If, however, you are not one of a select but international group of people who follows blobs of flour from pillar to post, from tree to bush and ultimately to the nearest bar, you may struggle to come up with a common theme.

I’ll give you a few more clues.

They like to run through streams, preferably streams which are deep enough to soak their armpits. Saves on washing, you see.

They like to go camping in the rain, I mean what normal organisation would select Glastonbury weekend for an annual campout?

And they never, repeat never, refer to each other by the names their mothers lovingly gave them. They prefer to come up with something a little more unusual, a little more descriptive, and hopefully, just a little bit offensive.

They are, in fact, hashers, and this weekend was the first ever TVH3 Murder Mystery Party.
And these were the monikers of some of the people who watched the action unfolding before them, asked pertinent questions of the cast, and then diligently filled out the “Whodunnit” forms.

Or not.

Dirty Oar filled in four forms, each with a different guess at the perpetrator. She knew there was chocolate on offer for the super sleuth who guessed the correct murderer.

Ramraider invented an unintelligible alternative to his Hash name, while one respondent who simply signed her form “Sue Smith” was ridiculed for revealing herself as the possessor of such a stupid name.

And the chalk outline that remained after the dead body removed himself from the kitchen floor has led me to wonder if it’s not perhaps our children who are the most adult among us.

the chalk

About Beta Mum

Here you can find the ramblings of a trapeze artist turned journalist who ran away from the circus to join the BBC. Cathy "mine's a Kir Royale" Keir then spent thirteen years working in Jersey, Guernsey and Devon, before downgrading to what you see before you. She has contributed articles to The Guardian, The Stage and Television Today, Junior Magazine and both the BBC and Bad Mothers Club websites. She has two children who think women can’t be prime ministers. She blames herself.
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5 Responses to Whodunnit?

  1. jameshigham says:

    Nope, give up. Who are they?

  2. Beta Mum says:

    Mr Obscure – so sorry to be obscure myself. My brain must be suffering from all the many trips I’m currently making on small planes. I have amended my post to make it clearer.

  3. Omega Mum says:

    I don’t know who they are either, but I like them, especially the one responsible for the artwork addition who is obviously desperate to move onto great big men cut out of chalk on hillsides. (Do you think they could be scene of the crime outlines carved out by giants playing whodunnit games back in the Olden Days, incidentally?)

  4. mid-lifer says:

    I know who hashers are!

    I once went hashing in Sumatra (brag brag) when I was out there doing my fieldwork. I only did it to get a bit of Western company and a slug of Bintang lager. But it did feel somehow wrong, doing a ‘down down’ in the middle of a village full of muslims looking on intrigued – offended my anthropological sensibilities a bit.

    We didn’t have nicknames though.

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